Growing up with Grandparents
On Friday, January 26th – it’s Republic Day, a
day to celebrate our Independence and watch the parade near Rashtrapati Bhavan.
But for me and my family, it’s also a day to celebrate wedding anniversary of
my Nana Nani – my maternal grandparents.
My childhood and teenage years include many memories with
them, as I was raised by them after the age of 11. My mom, brother and I moved
in with them after my mom’s separation.
For those who’ve lived with grandparents would agree that it
requires a different mindset and set of habits than living with parents only.
Due to a large generational gap, you can’t share everything with them like you
can with your parents – they’re emotionally distant from you in that sense.
But, they bring so much warmth and unconditional love in your life, borne from
their age and lesser need to control compared to your parents.
My Nani, Kamla Devi was a Guru Nanak devotee and visited the
Nanak Piao Gurudwara every day to serve and pray. It was her morning ritual to
take the rickshaw and spend a couple of hours at the gurudwara. She was a
fearless independent woman who refused to take the car/driver as much as
possible. She enjoyed being by herself.
At the Gurudwara after her prayers, she’d always ask for
extra prasaad for me and my brother, knowing how much we both loved it. I waited
every day to go back home from school in order to gobble it all up. I still go
back there for the prasaad when I visit home.
There are million such stories of unconditional love to
cherish.
My Nana, Roshan Lal Gidwani was an avid Bollywood lover, but
often he’d pretend not to be. However, when Katrina Kaif or Deepika Padukone
would appear on TV – he’d pull himself closer to television and watch them perform
with admiration. And then when my brother and I would tease him, he’d deny the
notion smilingly. Sometimes he’d admit to liking them -- JUST a tiny tad bit. It
was adorable.
Between both of them, they symbolized extreme dedication and
hard work for us. My nana passed away when he was 81 – but he worked until the
very end a couple of days before he was admitted to the hospital. His business,
his sweet shop in Chandni Chowk was his dream and passion, a huge part of his
life and who he was. His eyes would light up every time he talked about his
work, how mithai was made and the ‘secret’ ingredients that made it work. The
thought of full-time retirement irritated him immensely.
While we had help at home, my Nani enjoyed cooking and
taking care of her home by herself. She enjoyed the control that came with it. With
old age, her dedication and spirit only became stronger. She passed away when
she was 72, but her will to keep going was a shining example in the hospital
for everyone to witness.
On January 26th every year, our entire family and
extended families went for picnic to celebrate their companionship. It was the
favorite day of year for everybody. Amidst cake, warm desi food, many laughs, Tambola
and Cricket, it was them at the center of all celebration and their shadow on us
that made it special.
On this day after 10 years of our last picnic, I want to
remember them, cherish them and raise a toast to them with all my existence. Because I, along with
everyone in my family, exist today the way we are because of them. Because of
their perseverance, devotion, sincerity and the spirit to keep going. I am
where I am today because a 74-year old man and his wife decided to invest their life savings
into my education – the same man and woman who didn’t believe in higher education at some
point in their lives.
Here’s to them and their unconditional love! Happy
anniversary, Nana Nani!
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